believe (i won't leave you alone)
by Xephonia
Summary: Yuuma knows Shingetsu is hiding something, but he believes in him anyway.


_The prince was childish and had no faith in humanity. He doubted everyone and anyone, casting judgement upon them._

* * *

Yuuma isn't good with kanji, he doesn't think he's ever been— hiragana are easier and whenever he writes anything, there's way more hiragana than kanji in there. Others think it's odd, but as long as it's readable, it's not like it matters, right?

Besides, it's helpful when you don't know how someone's name is written.

 _"I'm Shingetsu Rei."_

At first, Shingetsu was just annoying to him— a bit too reckless, a bit too pushy— and Yuuma wondered if he had been this annoying to Shark, back then.

That impression didn't last, him and Shingetsu became friends quickly ( _too quickly?_ ) and Yuuma realized what bothered him about Shingetsu hadn't been the annoyance, but his own confusion over not being the one to initiate contact.

Realizing that was painful to Yuuma, he's sure he's hurt Shingetsu at first.

He knows 'Shingetsu' means 'true moon', and he somehow feels like Shingetsu would like nights like these, although he can't quite tell why.

And as Yuuma sits on the floor in his attic, scribbling messy kanji on scratch paper that's only illuminated by moonlight, he wonders what kanji Shingetsu's first name is written with—

—and why he calls him by his surname in the first place.

* * *

If there's one good thing about having a human body and being in the human world, then it's having access to the internet.

 _the meaning of having a first-name basis in the Japanese language_

Vector hits enter and scrolls down down the search results, quickly skimming for something useful.

 _Tsukumo Yuuma is calling all of his friends by their first names, so why not me?_

It's not exactly worry; Vector does not think that Yuuma could possibly have seen through his disguise, but he has to get as close as possible to Yuuma, so things like these matter.

Vector stops scrolling when he finds his answer. "First-name basis is for people who are really close, huh?"

Normally he'd blame it on Yuuma only knowing him for a few days, but Yuuma calls even complete strangers by their first names, so this can't be it.

 _Maybe for him it's the other way around?_

That will need some investigation, Vector figures, but he has time.

* * *

 _[Yuuma-kun, why do you always call me by my surname?]_

 _[I don't know. Just a habit, I guess?]_

Yuuma sighs and climbs into his hammock, staring at his D-Gazer as he waits for a response. He didn't want to be asked about this.

It's been two weeks since he's tried to write Shingetsu's first name, but he still doesn't know how, and even if he knew he wouldn't call Shingetsu by it, either.

 _We're such good friends already, and yet..._

He shakes his head and looks at the key, grateful that Astral is not around. Astral doesn't seem to like Shingetsu at all, and Yuuma _knows_ , he knows why, but if he accepts the thought, it'll become real.

 _[Oh, okay, that's fine, I guess. Hehe~ Then is it for the best if I call you Tsukumo-kun?]_

Yuuma frowns, he feels like he's hurt Shingetsu, but he can't feel well about calling him Rei.

 _[What? No! Calling me Yuuma is just fine. I'll go sleep now, see you tomorrow in school!]_

 _[Alright, see you tomorrow then, Yuuma-kun.]_

Yuuma sets his D-Gazer on his desk and climbs back into his hammock.

"I guess I'll have to kattobingu."

He closes his eyes. Even if he sleeps, he won't forget the way Shingetsu glances at him, the way Shingetsu is immune to Barian powers, the way Shingetsu always just so happens to show up when Barians are around, the way Barian-related trouble seems to magically follow Shingetsu, the way Shingetsu remembers things from the WDC he couldn't have seen as a normal spectator—

(the way it still feels nice when Shingetsu holds his hand and smiles at him)

—the way Shingetsu is hiding something.

Yuuma believes in his power to believe in others, and that's precisely why he wants to trust that Shingetsu is a good guy.

(He figures 'Shingetsu' is a nice surname, it contains the word 'true'.)

 _Besides, Shingetsu can still be a good guy even if he's a Barian, right?_

* * *

Shy kisses, dim lighting and the fact that Astral could come out of the key any minute.

 _It's awkward._

Yuuma knows, he's sure Shingetsu knows— _because why wouldn't he?_ — and that doesn't make it better.

The way his heart pounds doesn't make it better, either.

"What's wrong?" Shingetsu moves away a little, just so their noses are touching and he can speak. He strokes Yuuma's cheek, and Yuuma finds it hard to focus at all.

"Nothing's wrong," he says and smiles. He isn't a liar.

 _Everything is right, and that's the exact problem._

"I don't want to make you uncomfortable," Shingetsu mutters, scooting away until they can only holds hands.

Yuuma's grip on Shingetsu's hand tightens slightly. "It's not like that."

There's silence, Shingetsu strokes Yuuma's knuckles absent-mindedly, and Yuuma wonders what he's thinking, and where he should go from here.

Then he remembers.

"Shingetsu," Yuuma begins, looking around as if the artifacts in the attic would give him the right words. "How... how do you write your first name?"

Shingetsu looks at him now, first surprised, then smiling just a little. The small smile he has whenever something is wrong, but he doesn't want to tell Yuuma. "Like the number. Zero."

"Zero? Isn't it unusual to spell it like that?" Yuuma rubs the back of his neck with his free hand. "Why did your parents choose that?"

 _Shingetsu has never actually told me anything about his family._

Yuuma feels the knowledge tug at his heart again, but he ignores it.

"I don't really know, I never met my parents." Shingetsu looks at the ground. "But I suppose it's because that's what I am, or not? A zero."

 _If that's the case, I won't call him by his first name._

"Don't say that."

"Yuuma-kun..."

Yuuma feels Shingetsu hugging him, but he knows he should be the one hugging Shingetsu instead. He strokes Shingetsu's back and lets the other boy cry in his arms but—

 _Do Barians actually have families?_

* * *

Vector has nightmares. When he wakes up, he doesn't remember much except for pain and silhouettes. Silhouettes among which is his own, carrying something he assumes is a sword.

It only started ever since he started pretending to be Shingetsu, and he feels like it must be related.

He gets into his role a lot— _too much?_ —, he knows that, but it makes it all the more realistic in the end. He would prefer being without what he considers to be moments of human weakness, though.

 _Humans betray and in turn are betrayed by others. They are weak._

It's hard to get out of the role of Shingetsu sometimes, but he supposes that's proof of his great acting, and it has earned him some great results.

Yuuma is falling for him, he has some tragic backstory for his first name, it's all good.

 _But what is this anxiety?_

Vector figures being with Yuuma is a lot more comfortable than what it should be, in a weird way that he feels he knows— _has wanted to know?_ — since a long time ago, but he can't quite recall since when. Or, for that matter, if that feeling isn't just a trick his nightmares are playing on him.

Vector shakes his head and gets dressed. It's the weekend and he said he'd meet up with Yuuma, so he'd better be prepared.

A gut feeling tells him that something with Yuuma is wrong, and what's wrong with Yuuma can't be good for his plan.

 _Does he not trust me enough yet?_

Yuuma has been behaving strangely for a while now. It's almost like he knows more than what he lets on, but at the same time he doesn't seem to seek distance either.

 _Is he running into my trap on purpose? There's no way he's that stupid._

Vector remembers all the people Yuuma has trusted, and he figures that he is very unlikely to be the one exception.

 _It's probably just paranoia. Everything will end soon anyway._

He scowls, but he can't figure out why.

* * *

 _Is that all there is to it?_

Yuuma is in his hammock, staring at his D-Gazer as if it would make Shingetsu message him faster.

Shingetsu is a Barian, he's finally admitted it, but he says he's a good Barian. A Barian's Guardian.

 _Why all the stealth in the first place then?_

Other people would question if everything until that point was a lie, but Yuuma's main concern is whether there are more lies. He's very sure there are, he just has to know which ones— just in case the others are in danger. Whatever the truth may be, he will not leave Shingetsu alone.

Astral has been inside the key a lot lately, and at this point Yuuma is scared to consult him for advice. Shingetsu doesn't want him to, and Astral would be angry anyway.

 _It'd be his right to be angry_ , a small voice sounding a lot like Yuuma's own tells him, but he tries to block it out.

He remembers Alit, remembers Gilag, remembers what they said about Shingetsu. He trusts Shingetsu, but he also trusts Alit.

 _Shingetsu said he has not harmed Alit. Alit told Gilag that Shingetsu hurt him._

"What is the truth...?"

His D-Gazer buzzes.

 _[Do you want to meet up tomorrow? Not for work.]_

He smiles but he feels a tear roll down his cheek.

 _[Sure.]_

He'll believe in Shingetsu, no matter where that path leads.

Even if it leads to his ruin.

* * *

Shark dislikes Shingetsu, that much is for sure.

Yuuma can tell by the way Shark will pointedly avoid and ignore Shingetsu, and by the way Shark asks a lot more about Astral lately.

Even so, Shark is here now, he's with Yuuma on the airship and he looks at him, he sees through Yuuma's lies and _knows_.

It's bad because it's Shark. Shark has seen Yuuma lie and he's seen him apologize for it, he isn't supposed to see this happen again.

Shark doesn't say anything though, and that probably makes it even worse.

Yuuma wonders if Astral knows, but even if he does, it's too late for explanations now. All that's left is to hope for the best and kattobingu.

* * *

It's far worse than Yuuma has expected.

They're back home now. Everything is as it always was, yet something is missing.

The others trust him less, not in the obvious way, but far more subtle. His judgement is being questioned.

 _But in the end, I am myself. I can't change it._

In the end, he figures the reason why Vector chose the name Shingetsu Rei was to spite him, because Shingetsu been inexistent all along. _Zero, huh?_

He opens the internet, opens a search engine and types, alternate writings for 'Rei' and starts scribbling down the ones he likes.

 _lovely, beautiful_

He takes a photo, types a message to Shingetsu— Vector— with the words _[I don't like writing it with the kanji for 'zero']_ , gulps and hits send.

It's stupid, he knows, but he feels better having done it.

 _It's not like I'll ever call him Rei anyway._

He looks out of the window. Full moon.

 _'True moon', huh? I'll keep calling him that._

He types another message.

 _[Wanna meet up?]_

* * *

Vector looks at his D-Gazer and he isn't sure if what he's seeing is real.

He kept the D-Gazer in case it would become useful later, but here he is with a message from Yuuma, two alternate writings for Rei and an invitation to meet up. In the middle of the night.

If anything, he'll be able to taunt Yuuma— _or even steal the key?_ —, so this can't possibly go wrong.

He hopes that Don Thousand isn't watching, because the Barian god definitely doesn't need to know of this.

 _[Wait for me on your rooftop.]_

* * *

"Still in love with Shingetsu?" Vector greets Yuuma as he steps out of the portal and sits down next to him.

It stings inside Yuuma's heart, but he knew this would happen, that's part of why he wanted to meet Vector.

 _Maybe that'll make the upcoming fights easier._

Yuuma thinks before giving Vector an actual answer. "Yeah, I still love you, Shingetsu." He grins. "Not like you share that sentiment, is it?"

"Of course not, it was all a lie to begin with." Vector scowls. "Why are you so happy? Shouldn't you hate me?"

"Well, you see..." Yuuma begins and looks up at the moon. "I'm angry. I'm really angry. But I can't hate you."

"You make no sense." Vector sits down next to him. "So, what is this about? Trying to convince me to play friends again? Or do you want to fight? I don't see Astral anywhere."

Yuuma shakes his head and smiles. "Just meeting you one last time before we're enemies."

"We have always been enemies."

"Then why are you here?"

There's a moment of silence and Vector biting his lip, then—

"To make fun of you and to steal the key."

"You didn't lie this time."

"No reason to."

They sit there for a while, just looking at the sky, and Vector reaches out for the key, actually has it in his hands—

and stops.

Yuuma laughs. "You say everything was a lie, but what you do right now is definitely something Shingetsu would do."

"What?!"

"Well, you know, you always had a habit of not making things easy for yourself. You used that entire complicated plan with Dr. Faker and Tron when you could've just pushed me off this rooftop." Yuuma's laugh sounds nervous now; he doesn't want Vector to actually get ideas, but he figures Vector would've come to such an easy solution long ago. "Then you stuck around with me for months and became my boyfriend even though I left the key in your care often enough for you to just steal it. And you take strange shortcuts to school although it makes the way longer."

Vector's grip on the key loosens and he scowls. "So what?"

"You didn't pretend as much as you say you did," Yuuma concludes and puts his fingers on Vector's. "Did you have fun?"

"I had fun when I saw your pained expression after I told you the truth."

But for Yuuma, what Vector said is enough. Now he can be sure that something within Vector is the existence he calls Shingetsu.

Yuuma gives him headaches. Awful headaches. Whenever their fingers touch, Vector sees the silhouettes from his nightmares, it's almost like there are blurry memories.

The worst part is that Yuuma isn't even wrong.

Vector doesn't like easy solutions, because _what's the point of just throwing your enemy off a cliff or a rooftop?_

That was fun with Nasch and Merag but he'd waited around 550 years for that, that's different.

He couldn't care less for the Barian World or any world for that matter, it's just the most logical decision to side with his own kind given that the Astral World seems to be interested in killing them all. It doesn't mean he can't have some fun along the way, though.

"You seemed to have fun on those shortcuts, too."

 _Stop this. You don't love me. You love an illusion that doesn't exist._

"Because you almost died a few times."

"You caught me when I fell, anyway."

 _That's enough._

"Not this time," Vector hisses and he gives Yuuma a hard push.

Yuuma gasps, barely holds onto the ledge of the roof at looks up at Vector. "Shingetsu! Why?!"

"I told you, I'm not Shingetsu." Vector grins now, and he extends his hand, sees Yuuma reach for it, sees Yuuma trust him _again_ —

 _Focus._

—and pulls away.

He sees the despair and feeling of betrayal in Yuuma's eyes, and it's _good._

 _That was what I needed._

"Good luck getting back up." Vector opens a portal. "Next time we meet, I'll kill you."

As he walks through the portal, he hears Yuuma shout for Shingetsu, but he doesn't look back.

* * *

The next time they meet, Yuuma doesn't call him Shingetsu anymore, and Vector takes delight in making fun of that.

 _This is how it's supposed to be._

The friendship and love games are over, from here he'll just have Yuuma falling to hell over and over again.

Until it comes down to the great finale.

* * *

Or so he thought, except he's the one almost falling to hell now— quite literally— and Yuuma is the only thing saving him from being absorbed by Don Thousand.

 _For once, that bastard Nasch is right, I have no soul._

Yuuma goes on about how it's his kattobingu and how even if Vector betrays him again, he'll trust him; how Vector is Shingetsu, how that's his true self, and Vector finds it _stupid_ because at this point Yuuma is just running after an inexistent person.

 _Even if I let myself get dragged back up now, I won't be able to make it._

Vector figures that dying without having killed the person for defeating whom he'd come so far would be pathetic. He gives Yuuma hope, once more—

 _He loves the lie I played. Not me._

—and declares he'll drag Yuuma down with him.

Now is where Yuuma will loathe him and try to run, and _that's good, that's what's supposed to happen, isn't it_? They are enemies.

"Now, come here!" Vector shouts, and he waits in anticipation, wants to see Yuuma's terrified expression—

and sees Yuuma's tears instead.

Feels them, in fact, as Yuuma agrees to falling to hell with him as if it was completely fine, as Yuuma tells him that he won't be alone, as Yuuma promises to protect him.

(And he remembers every time Yuuma has said one of these things, and has said them in the past when there were lies, says them in the present when there is truth, says them when everyone needs him and yet he's completely willing to die with Vector.)

 _But Yuuma loves Shingetsu, doesn't he?_

—"a cheerful, nosy jerk who caused me a ton o' grief all the time"—

Vector sees himself as Shingetsu, then sees himself as himself, and he realizes the description matches both, although in different ways.

 _He loves me, doesn't he? What an idiot._

Vector figures he should've known, and he lets go with one of his hands.

"Shingetsu?" Despair in Yuuma's eyes.

It's not satisfying this time.

"You're a ridiculously simple soul. But I can't drag you down with me."

Vector takes a moment before he can look at Yuuma; he hears the "Oi, Shingetsu!" and feels Yuuma's tears again, and his decision is final.

"This is farewell." He lets go, he looks and Yuuma and he smiles. "Yuuma-kun."

And then he falls, hears Yuuma shouting for Shingetsu, shouting for him—

(They say before you die, your entire life flashes before your eyes. Vector only sees memories of himself and Yuuma, and he wonders if it means he'll live.)

—and then he hears and sees nothing.

* * *

When Vector wakes up, his head is cradled in Yuuma's lap, Yuuma runs his hand through his hair, and Vector is about to close his eyes again.

 _It's nice._

"You're awake, don't pretend to be asleep", Yuuma says, and he pouts a little. "We took care of Don Thousand, it's all fine now."

"Then how am I alive?" Vector looks at Yuuma in slight confusion. "If he dies, the Barian World goes with him, and so do the Barians."

"Well... Astral used the Numeron Code and revived all of you and made some adjustments." Yuuma laughs. "The other Barians woke up an hour ago. Shark says you can live with the others and him if you don't attempt to kill anyone."

"Can't make promises there." Vector chuckles a little. "Yuuma?"

"Yeah?"

"Why did you never call me Rei?"

"The reason for that changed a lot over time," Yuuma admits and smiles. "At some point I just figured 'Shingetsu' fits the most because it contains the word 'true'. I wanted the things you said and did to be true, and in the end, I guess they were, in a way."

"You wanted... wait, you—"

"Yeah, I knew." Yuuma laughs just a little. "For a long time before you revealed it, actually. It's stupid, I know, but I really wanted to be with you. I believed in you, and I still do."

"You're a ridiculously simple soul," Vector says, and he knows he's said it already, but it describes what he thinks of Yuuma the best. "You know things won't be like before ever again, right?"

"Yeah, I know. But we're friends; we can start over, we have all time in the world." Yuuma's smile stays, and Vector feels nice, it's like—

 _I'm home._

"Sure. Won't guarantee for Nasch's safety though."

"Oi, you—"

Vector sits up and puts a finger on Yuuma's mouth. "Call me Vector. It's been my name for almost 600 years, and it's bothersome to have people calling me different names all the time. Besides, it's more straightforward and true than any name I could come up with." Vector takes his finger away.

"It _is_ your real name, after all." Yuuma scratches his head. "Alright then, Vector. By the way..." He pauses for a second. "...never mind." Yuuma is about to laugh and change the topic, but Vector scowls.

"Spit it out." Vector scoots away a little so he doesn't sit so close to Yuuma anymore.

Yuuma smiles slightly. "We aren't... boyfriends anymore, are we?"

"No. At least not for now."

"By 'not for now', you mean—"

Vector nods, and Yuuma pulls him into a hug.

"Get off of me!"

"You're starting to sound like Shark!"

 _"Ugh..."_

Getting hugged by Yuuma or being told again that he has things in common with Nasch? For Vector, the choice is easy.

 _Getting hugged by Yuuma._

So Vector waits until Yuuma has finished hugging him, he figures that _yeah, I've missed this a bit_ , he immediately wants to hit himself for admitting that, but he figures it's fine.

"So, wanna go visit the other Barians'?" Yuuma asks and stands up, holding out a hand to help Vector up.

Vector hesitates for a second, but—

("I won't leave you alone!")

—and he takes Yuuma's hand and gets up, too.

"I think it's for the best if we take a shortcut."

* * *

 _Upon seeing what sincere emotions are, the prince regained some faith in humanity. He still doubts and judges most people, but at least he can trust one person now._


End file.
